What about "Them"?
A word commonly used to encapsulate the details and minutiae of relationships is Nature.
"What is the nature of your relationship?" "It was just in their nature." "They came about naturally." "Act natural." All things we've probably heard or questions we've probably posed.
One might wonder, however, can a relationship, of any kind, ever be "natural"? Does one person always want something, either consciously or subconsciously, from another? Who's interests do we have at heart? Is it even possible for it to be anybody but ourselves?
Well in that same line of questioning I might add: are the varying "natures" of our closest relationships actually reflections of our inner most desires?
It has been said that we are who we surround ourselves with. Well, what if WHY we surround ourselves with who we do, is the key to understanding what we truly want?
What do you think...?
To answer that question with another question: what if we do, in fact subconsciously, do everything in a self-serving manor? So what? If you're talking about these questions through the lens of relationships, maybe the best way to tell if you are with the right person is by thinking about what actually is most important to YOU. Asking yourself this question could be kind of a litmus test. If what you care about is your partner or what is best for them, then what you have is genuine, hypothetically. If your wants are more selfish then maybe it's not the person for you. To me, a relationship should make you want to put somebody else above yourself at sometimes. There's…
This is a personal example, but in my relationship I worry that I’m putting in too much effort. In my past I’ve had issues with the other person not putting in as much effort. I think I put in so much extra effort in these cases because I’m trying to show the other person what I want for myself. To the end of this question: maybe the nature of our relationships can reveal the nature of ourselves.